Anna Ganotskaya
anna@santosaphuket.com
Many people who first come to Phuket find it a dreamer’s paradise that will last forever, and they decide to move here. Some people stay for a few years, some make it their home. Everyone who stays eventually goes through the long adaptation and integration process.
When the veil of charm has fallen we start to recognise things that are far from perfect in the land of smiles. We notice things that we believe to be much better in our home countries. Then we try to face and adapt to the reality. Or we start to pull on our own perception to this reality and refuse to accept things.
Some people find their place in the sun: open a business, find an interesting job or are simply satisfied with spending time in the sun without desiring anything else. But not everyone is getting what they want by changing location. Many, after being in the sun for a while, start to realise that problems that they were running from are not melted by the tropical heat. The scenery has changed but the same questions remains: who am I? Why am I here? What should I do with my life?
The truth is: you cannot run from yourself. If the idea of living among beautiful beaches is no longer appealing to you, it is probably time to look inside of yourself and sort things out: what really does not serve me anymore?
One of the ways to deal with life dissatisfaction is Gestalt Therapy.
It is a psychotherapeutic approach that was developed by Fritz Perls and its main principals focus upon the individual’s experience and his consciousness of the present moment, the environmental and social contexts of a person’s life as well as his emotions and feelings and looking at the person as a whole.
Gestalt Therapy acts on the principle that ‘we are the only ones responsible for what is happening in our lives.’ Most of these people who decided to live in a foreign country can prove that it was their perceived and voluntary choice. So, if we all know that everything depends on us, then why is it that sometimes we find ourselves not doing what we want, socialising with the wrong people and going to places we don’t want to be? Stop and think: do you like what you are doing in your life now? Would you like to remember the feeling that everything in your life is in your hands?
Another important thing about Gestalt Therapy is focusing on the present moment. Unlike a psychoanalyst who will ask you questions about the past or a specialist in cognitive psychotherapy who will focus your attention on the future, gestalt therapists will look at the present. Gestalt Therapy gives importance to what is happening to you here and now and not what already happened or might happen tomorrow. Only the present is real and truthful. Memories and plans can change with time.
Another hallmark of Gestalt Therapy is focusing attention on feelings and body sensations. Our body is not separable from thoughts and feelings even if we refuse to acknowledge it. Our brain tends to seek sophisticated ways to explain everything by coming up with very rational stories when sensations in the body recognise our truth. Redness, shortness of breath, sweating, clenched fists and cheekbones are real physical manifestations of feelings such as love, anger, fear and others. Some people have developed their brain in this direction so much so they can’t feel their own feelings anymore. That person will be able to share their opinion on a number of things but will have trouble with describing their feelings.
Our conclusions are not always based on proven facts, for example the body can be a great indicator of what is happening with the person. If my body is warm and relaxed it means I feel safe and comfortable. If my body is tensed it means that there is something inside or outside that causes this tension. To recognise what exactly is bothering me however, is not always easy.
One more feature of Gestalt Therapy is the contact with a therapist. The way that the client and therapist communicate with each other can tell the therapist a lot about how the client communicates with other people. In the presence of an attentive listener a person will express the same reactions to situations that they would make in real life. Analysing your own reactions, you can expand your perspective on situations, on other people and yourself. Realise that you always have a choice on how to react on things. Awareness gives more freedom.
So, Gestalt Therapy is effective with issues such as
- Relationships between partners, parents and children, friends, colleagues, acquaintances and other people.
- Feeling of loneliness
- Inner conflicts: I want, but I can’t; I can, but I don’t want to but I have to; I want to but I don’t see the way how to do it…etc.
- Making choices; how to behave in difficult situations
- Fears and intrusive thoughts and desires
- Feeling miserable and many others
Often psychological issues appear through physical pain or illnesses that doctors fail to diagnose. That could be a sign to see a specialist that helps to heal not the body but the soul.
When life circumstances change we need to find a way to adapt to these new conditions. For instance disease, divorce, relocation, resignation, dismissal (especially in crisis) or changing a job. It is possible that there are not enough inner resources to go through the difficulties. Then, one of the effective ways to get you support is from psychotherapy.
Santosa Wellness Center has a professional psychotherapist who works with the Gestalt approach. To book a session, call the Santosa office on 076 330 600.
Santosa Wellness Center
With views of the Andaman Sea, the Santosa Wellness Center features state-of-the-art facilities, the centre boasts a five-star raw and vegetarian restaurant, a juice and coffee bar, eight colon hydrotherapy rooms, a pavilion with an expansive range of healthy activities, a herbal steam sauna, and a plunge-style ice bath.
santosaphuket.com